Although many people think that we have Pepsi and their other brands, sitting in giant tanks round the back ready to drink, we don't. I say many people think because no one ever seems to understand that although a drink has ran out...it is going to be coming back in a minute when we change the box of syrup...we're not waiting for a tanker full of it to be delivered.
So anyway...some background. We have 5 carbonated drinks, each with two boxes of syrup. These boxes...I think can make...40 litres of drink...? So that's effectively 400 litres of soft drinks we can have available instantly...plus a large stock of replacements. The gas however is another matter. It lasts a long time...well about 4 days...but when it runs out if affects all the drinks, because the go flat. So we run up, and change the gas.
But the gas, then takes a lot of water to run through the system to allow the drinks to be carbonated. We do this manually by pressing the 'soda' button (it uses no syrup - just water). But because the machine isn't drained we have to get a jug, fill it up with this water, then pour it in a bucket. When it finally works again, the bucket is about 3/4 full.
So there I am, with a jug and stainless steel bucket...making the gas come through. There is a man hovering round.
"Hi can I use the machine?"
"No it has ran out of gas...it won't be a minute though"
He hovers a bit more
"Oh so is it being fixed?"
"Yes...shouldn't be long"
He hovers a bit more
"Are you doing it?"
"No I'm just getting a pitcher of water for myself"
"Yes"
"Oh ok"
He hovers - for around 3 seconds
"So you are doing it - right?"
"No mate, I've just got my pitcher of water but I've decided to get a bucket instead, should last longer"
"YES!"
"So what exactly are you doing then...I've never seen this before"
"Why the hell would you have seen it before...and even if I explain you'll be confused"
"Just pumping water through, so it draws the gas, oh look, good - it's done now..there you go!"
Didn't say those bits, just thought them.
Then later on, I saw this woman, hammering the drinks machine. She couldn't work out how to get any of the drinks...not that difficult really but some people need it explaining. Problem was, she was very rude. I'm stood there going "Excuse me..." "Madam.." "EXCUSE ME MADAM....ARE YOU OK". Then she turned round, and looked straight at me in the eye - I thought I was going to get shot or something, she looked evil. She was actually just German and couldn't understand a word I was saying. So I just pointed at the 5 drinks, in a "Which do you want, moron?" manner...and did her drink.
Oh and the last thing I did before I went home, was make a small girl cry. I try to do this as often as possible because it very satisfying. No, actually I felt quite guilty, but I'm not going to allow her to get away with using a KFC cup on our drinks machine. Come on parents, watch your kids a bit more...she was only about 3 and wondering round a shopping centre on her own. Not clever.
Sorted out the lime green font!!
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Its even more fun if you say what you are thinking. They never forget you after that. I did a seven stretch with the Hut. Some of my best and worst days. Tips were crap though...
Don't you just love people like that?
My favouite was watching a woman approach a bank of three multi-storey parking pay machines;
She walked up to the middle one, which was the only one with two huge pieces of "hazard" tape across it in a "cross" pattern, and a sign saying "out of order".
She tried to insert her parking token four or five times into it, with it just "falling through" the switched off machine each time, and she got madder and madder with each attempt.
Suddenly, as if a screen went up from in front of her eyes, she appeared to "see" the tape / sign, and realised her error.
Did you ever see that "Fast Show" sketch with Paul Whitehouse as "The Tweed Man", playing a character buying trousers in a shop? Your story reminds me of that;
/quote from http://magneton.hut.fi/Q/horse/files/fastshow_scripts/script25.htm
"13. THE TWEED MAN
PW Er, thish ish a clothesh shop, ishn't it?
[PS - the sales assistant - nods]
PW Ah. And theshe are the troushersh, are they?
PS Trousers.
PW Right. And they're £29.99, are they?
[a sign next to PW reads, "ALL TROUSERS "29.99"]
PS That's right.
PW Right. Yesh. Ah! Ooh - theshe are niche, here. Are theshe ?29.99?
PS Y-yes. All trousers, ?29.99. Er, what size are you, sir?
PW I'm a thirty two.
PS Thirty two.
[PS picks a pair out of the rack]
PS Well... here you are, sir.
PW Oh, right. Theshe are a thirty two, are they?
PS Er, yes. "
...cont
/endquote
Oh, and like the new header graphic too.
Hey I was in an FSR the other day and left the girl a nice £5 tip.
Is that nice or cheap? I didnt know by how she looked at me.
The new header looks great, the green text is a little hard to read though.
A fiver! That's very nice. People in FSR/RBD get about the same an hour in tips, as their hourly rate. £1 or nothing is most common according to a guy who worked in one and then moved to our Hut.
Ah well, she was helpful and kept refilling my drink without question.
Deserving of it.
Mind you, we had the cheesy bites pizza with the dip, but I couldnt for the life of me remember where I had tasted that dip before.
I haven't tasted it..but I reckon from the description either Tomato Snaps or Salsa Doritos.
Did you like the cheesy bites overall? We have sour cream and chive dip and they are pretty nice, but on their own...I think they a bit like "sick".
Just to add, I agree with Al... although I read your posts via RSS myself, that green text is very hard to read on the html page.
Regards.
Yay on the change to Red! ;-)
...she was actually just German...
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